Ever After, Part 12

A couple of times every week, Lani would ask Zidane for another story. Zidane was only too glad to tell them. He spoke of the Card Tournament in Treno, the Desert Palace, The Festival of the Hunt, the Qu Marshes all around the world. Each time he told a different story, and each time Lani listened with rapt fascination.

After the groceries started to arrive, everyone had more free time. Rather than having to spend that time hunting or tending the garden for the best yield, they spent time with each other. They would swap stories and fantasies. Each found out more about the others and with that understanding, they grew closer. Mikoto was perhaps the most interested of them all. She listened to Lani intently, gleaning from her information on how to survive in this strange new world. Mikoto would also listen to Zidane's stories of Garnet and her dreams of freedom. She found many parellels in her life with that of the princess and she was anxious to point them out. At most of Mikoto's stories, Kuja would grow quiet and withdrawn as if trying to forget the past. He had stories of his own, though, about the sights of Bran Bal and the records Garland kept of the lost world.

Those weeks bled into a month and one month became two. Time together became more infrequent as Mikoto got increasingly ill. Kuja doted on her only allowing Zidane and Lani to visit her from time to time.

Lani and Zidane had to resort to entertaining each other either with practice fighting or the rare lovemaking. Little served to alleviate their boredom, however, and as time went on, they became more concerned for Mikoto's health.

Even Kuja showed signs of wear after a couple of weeks. His hair was only loosely groomed and most days he walked around in only his tight leather pants with his hair loose over his shoulders. His fatigue showed in tight muscles on his back and bags under his eyes. Zidane began to wonder if he'd been eating at all. He certainly devoted much of his time making sure Mikoto ate and drank enough.

Unexpectedly, Lani walked into the room one day and approached Kuja who was snoozing with his chin on his chest and sitting on the end of the bed. "Hey..." Lani gripped his thin shoulder and gave it a light shake. "Kuja, wake up."

Blearily, Kuja opened his eyes. The ice blue had dimmed to something like a powder blue. He watched Lani blankly as he tried to recover himself from his dreams. "What is it?"

Lani took a step back and put her hands on her hips. "Look, if you want to get out- - get some fresh air for a while, I'll watch Mikoto for ya."

Kuja's first impulse was to protest, but he sorely needed to get out. His body ached from long nights of standing watch over his young lover and the stress of worrying for her. With a sigh, he resigned and left the bed with a murmured word of thanks. Lani took a seat beside the bed quietly. When Kuja paused at the door to consider whether Lani could be trusted with the task, Lani hurried him off with a shoo-shoo motion of her hand.

Venturing out into the kitchen/living area, Kuja discovered Zidane had stepped out. A collection of thoughts weighed heavily on his mind and he dearly wanted to engage Zidane for a while. He'd had so little time to do so in the past couple of weeks. With a sense of urgency, he searched for Zidane in all the usual places. Finally, he found Zidane sitting on the lip of a broken fountain in the middle of a quaint courtyard surrounded by crumbling walls. Zidane watched the afternoon sunlight dance over the edge of his Dagger. Apparently, he was lost in thought. Kuja approached inobtrusively and sat beside his younger brother.

Zidane glanced up with a distant smile. As Kuja had expected, he was somewhere else in his own memories, but Zidane came back to the present quickly enough for a quiet, "Good to see you out. How's Miko doing?"

Kuja blinked drowsily and shook his head. "Some days she is better than others, but she still complains of sickness in her stomach and aches everywhere. Most of the time I just leave her to rest under a sleep spell. I'm afraid what I'm doing for her isn't enough, though."

"Don't blame yourself, okay. You're no doctor. Maybe that's what Mikoto needs right now." Zidane rubbed Kuja's naked back with his palm. His hand slid over the silky skin and hard muscles, raising goosebumps over Kuja's sides and arms.

Leaning into his touch, Kuja rested his head on Zidane's shoulder. Silver hair spilled down Zidane's back and chest and he pet his tenderly. "I know the nearest doctor is across the ocean, but maybe if I can find a chocobo..."

Kuja shook his head. "No need. I know more about genome physiology than any Gaian doctor would. I've never seen this in any other genome. Maybe it's a native disease, or an allergy to the food."

Wrapping his arm over Kuja's shoulder, Zidane countered, "Then if it were a Gaian disease, don't you think a Gaian doctor would know how to treat it? We genomes can't stay separate from the inhabitants of this world forever. It might be useful for other doctors to know about us. Don't you think?"

Kuja fell into a thoughtful silence. Just when Zidane thought he might have fallen asleep on his shoulder, the older genome spoke up. "I remember some doctors trying to treat stray Black Mages. They were clueless and of course the Black Mages couldn't communicate what was wrong for themselves. One doctor pronounced them zombies and tried to cure them with some sort of clear medicine. Another tried to revive one with a phoenix down after it died. If they knew nothing about Black Mages, why should they know anything about us?"

"Well, none of the Black Mages knew about their own physio-wazzit. You could teach them, I'm sure."

With a non-committal shrug, Kuja snorted, "I have no patience for the Gaians."

"Even Lani?" Zidane prodded.

"Especially her," he grumped. After a moment, he admitted, "Though she has grown more tolerable."

Zidane thought on the situation for a time, then proposed, "If you won't teach the doctors, why not teach the other genomes? It's in their best interest."

Kuja sat up and looked Zidane in the eye. "You really want me to be some savior for our race, don't you? Even though you know I'm reluctant."

After a skyward glance, Zidane nodded. "I know you hate them, but I try and stay optimistic. I know you have it in you to help if you want to. You helped my friends out after Necron's attack and that was totally selfless."

Those tired eyes lingered on Zidane's and then twitched right and left. "You've got more white hairs than I remember you having," Kuja remarked in a quiet voice.

Ignoring the subject change, Zidane pulled his bangs straight and examined them. Sure enough there were a few silver hairs among the normal gold. "Heh heh, so premature gray runs in the family, huh?"

Kuja seemed much less flippant about it. "Your hair will turn silver the more you use your powers. Mine was this color before I was your age. Even Mikoto has a few silver hairs."

"Really..." Zidane answered, trying to sound thoughtful. He wasn't sure where Kuja was going with the conversation, though. "So your hair was once gold like mine, huh?"

"For a time." Kuja rested his head on Zidane's shoulder again. "The silver suits me better, I think."

Zidane fell silent, trying to imagine Kuja with gold hair like all the other genomes. Meanwhile, Kuja considered his next statement carefully. After a while, he decided to ease into the subject with, "It's been a long time since we were able to sit and talk like this. I miss being this close with you." Kuja's words were answered with a light hug. "I've missed touching you," Kuja admitted at length. "I've wanted to feel you inside me again. Our bodies moved together so well, and you fit me like a satin glove." As he spoke, Kuja stroked the inside of Zidane's thigh.

The younger genome grew tense under Kuja's enticing touch. He didn't want to give in this time. What if Lani were to walk in on them, or by rare chance, Mikoto? What would he say? How would he explain? How would it look if a lady's man like him was making love to another man. With a blush, Zidane sheepishly guided Kuja's hand away from his thigh.

"You don't want me anymore?" Kuja seemed hurt, but didn't move.

"It's not that- - I... It just doesn't feel right anymore, Kuja. Don't get me wrong, I really liked it while it lasted, but things have changed."

"Things are always changing, Zidane," Kuja said with a bitter edge. He pulled away from Zidane's shoulder and moved so he could look the younger genome directly in the eye once again. "Just give me one more kiss, and if you still feel differently, I'll leave you alone about it."

Zidane looked down as he considered the proposal. "Right. Just one kiss, but I'm not promising anything, bro."

The older genome sniffed lightly. Zidane regretted not going along with Kuja's advances initially. Their lips touched, massaging each other with practiced movements. Sadly, Zidane knew there wouldn't be anymore sexual feelings for Kuja. It just wasn't there. For a moment before their lips parted, he actually missed those passionate hours spent tangled together. Things had changed as he said, though. Feelings had changed; circumstances, and relationships changed with them. Their tongues touched, rolling over each other lazily. Zidane didn't feel Kuja needed him anymore with Mikoto to care for and frankly, his mind had been rather preoccupied with his Garnet sitting alone on her throne somewhere.

Kuja was the first to pull away. His eyes were half-lidded and he licked his lips. When Zidane shook his head, Kuja closed his eyes and stood. As if gripped with sudden chills, Kuja his arms close to his chest and paced once around the ruined fountain. Zidane couldn't stand the silence anymore. He still loved Kuja enough to not let him suffer in the silence. "I'm sorry, bro. I'd pretend, but my heart just wouldn't be in it."

The subject was waved away quickly. Kuja put his hand to his forehead and kneaded his brow. I need to tell him now before I lose my nerve, he thought. In a harsh whisper, Kuja began, "Things change too quickly in this world and we have so little time to enjoy anything."

A small crease appeared between Zidane's eyebrows as he tried to figure out where Kuja was going with such a statement. Kuja turned his back to the younger genome and began pacing again. When next he spoke, his voice was louder and more resolute. "You alone out of our entire race could keep up with time. You took what joy you could from the changes and shared them with us. Sometimes I feel cheated- - robbed of my own time. I feel indignant on Mikoto's behalf that she was used as such a tool." Zidane opened his mouth to speak but Kuja silenced him almost off-handedly with a spell. "I'm jealous of you, but I'm sure you know that. I couldn't even experience the world vicariously through my creations as Garland did. If it weren't for you, my life story would have ended with my defeat at the Iifa tree.

"You alone had the power to grant me enough time to reclaim some of what I'd lost. What I missed out on, you were only too happy to share with me. Your wisdom, wit, and ingenuity- - it was all more than our creator ever gave to you and it was yours to share with us. You're the key to our survival Zidane.

"I realized this months ago. I realized how lucky I was. I wondered how much I would have experienced if not for you. Would I ever have found happiness or any real hope?

"Hope... I used to think it was such a false and weak emotion, but I suppose its what kept all these Gaians going from day to day. I watched them struggle after their cities were destroyed. I thought them pathetically valiant but ultimately stupid creatures. What plans did they have to defeat us? Why rebuild their cities if we could come and destroy them again with minimal effort? Hope is more powerful than death, apparently."

Kuja's tail swept the ground limply while he paused to catch his breath. "My hope is that Mikoto and I will live long enough to pass on what we've learned from you to the other genomes and maybe even the Black Mages. Your advice might seem so trite to you, but we never had abstract concepts like 'Look on the bright side'." Kuja hugged himself again, looking as if he were really struggling to get to the point of his speech. "Everything changes. You're right. I can't live in the past. I have to keep looking forward to what little future I have."

Kuja was cut off by a choke. His throat had grown tight and he fought back tears. Zidane considered standing to comfort his brother but was afraid Kuja might toss out a paralysis spell too. "What I'm trying to say, Zidane- - What I'm trying to say, as your brother is... I'm dying."